Cowboy Caleb the liberal arts, grown-up stuff & random mischief

A Street To Call My Own

Some gay blogger goes off whoring and discovers that there are entire streets dedicated to Cowboy Caleb.
Dude, is this Pattaya or Bangkok? There are Soi Cowboy’s in most nearly every other large Thai sex ghetto.

Tourists Shocked At Animal Abuse On Msian Resort

Scenes of starvation and death greeted tourists who signed up for horse riding on the beach while enjoying their holiday in Sabah, Malaysia.
The tourists had visited the Melinsung ranch located 20 mins South of Kota Kinabalu to sign up for the activity. What they found left them sickened. Starving and weak horses, some unable […]

My Lord, You’re Crazy

Today a colleague told me that she doesn’t like going into Indian restaurants, because of the Hindu Idols that are sometimes in there.
Perplexed, I asked why that was so.
“Because they look so scary to Christians”
You know what’s scary? The person who made the remark above has 2 master degrees, pulls in at least 200k per […]

Earthquake Weather

I didn’t feel the tremors, but plenty of you did - prompting a slew of sms’s and emails.
Is it just me, or does it feel like the end of the world, liao?

Painkillers, I Lack Severely

I am not well but am in China anyway and running out of painkillers.
So what does the world look like when you’re running out of painkillers in a foreign country? Pretty f87ked up, I can tell you that.

Chinese Driver From Hell

I usually engage a private driver to ferry me about town when I am in China. He’s at my beck and call day and night, which suits my purposes. This is a common practice in China, where foreigners usually hire the services of a private driver instead of a taxi because they have clean comfortable […]

No Wonder I’m Old & Stupid

And there is a whole array of diseases that are now being tied to damage to this DNA - Parkinson’s and quite a lot of neuro-degenerative diseases, but above all the whole process of ageing.”
I was watching the 10pm news when it was suddenly announced that fizzy drinks make you dumb, slow and age faster. […]

Flow My Tears, The Policeman Said

Here is a summary of sexist remarks made in the Malaysian Parliament. That’s right. Here are the leaders of the nation, role-models for the young and all-round good old dinosaurs.
via

I’m Glad I’m Not An Aspiring Lawyer In Malaysia

So Maybank Malaysia says that if you run a law firm and want to do any business with them then there must be a minimum of three partners, of which one must be Bumiputra with a minimum 50% stake in the firm.
Aren’t lawyers supposed to be judged on merit, and not race?
Maybank is the largest […]

Stupidity Rules The Day In Malaysia

KUALA LUMPUR, May 5 (Bernama) — Information Minister Datuk Seri Zainuddin Maidin said today Malaysia has to classify web bloggers as professionals and non-professionals as a mechanism to prevent misuse of blog sites.
I am speechless. An Ingformayshun minister - nothing less than a minister comes up with an ludicrous idea like this. You gotta wonder […]

Bad Day

I’m having like a really f87ked up day in China, and suddenly the missus calls up to say while she was stuck in a jam, a motorbike hit the left side mirror, bent it 30 degrees out and ran away.
^&$#^%$*%$(!!)(#(*$&#&^$ F87k him and may his offspring have no anus!

Choking Down Disappointment

This just came in the mail. The babe above is Angelica Panganiban who owes her incredible looks to overzealous photoshopping. Think I’m bs’ing you?
Check this out.

Defend Jesus From Fat Ugly People With Opinions Y’All

Agagooga gets a brain transplant
Do any of you gentlefolk out there know Agagooga?
He is large, sports long hair and runs a wildly entertaining blog. In his sparetime, Agagooga raises the general intelligence of the singapore public by serving on a meta-blog called Tomorow.sg as an editor.
Yeah… so anyway, one of his pet peeves is getting […]

I am Jack’s’s’s’s’s’s’s’s’s’s’s Punctuation

Woke up today at 8am. My transport to work was scheduled for 8am - shitf87kdamn. The sudden false winter that has hit Southern China made sleep really enjoyable last night. Because I had a conference call at 8.30am, I dressed in a hurry and had to skip breakfast.
That hot wild smell of his anus
Can’t think […]

Whinings Of A Loser

Today, I woke up at 5am and made my way to the airport. There, I proceeded to purchase a copy of Esquire magazine and had breakfast at Burger King (Subway was closed). At 8am, I boarded the plane to Guangzhou. On the plane, I dozed off because I didnt get enough sleep the night before […]

My Blog, It Sucks

I have no idea what happened to my blog. I think I used to be interesting and capable of writing shite like this.
These days, I’m just plain boring.

Broken

It’s starting again after the longest time. I am no longer able to look myself in the mirror in the morning. A wave of revulsion from fear & self-loathing washes over my clammy skin. I havent been sleeping or eating well.
I hate being an adult.

No More Wind Beneath My Feet

Have I only been awake 3 hours and 30 minutes? It seems like a lifetime. Time moves so slowly for me these days. A month feels like a year. A day feels like an eternity. The passage of grains of sand that fall for me seem to float and linger in the air before reaching […]

Dear Jesus, I Need Some Lerigion

Dear Jesus,
The Catholic faith is not my faith, but rather the faith of my grandmother (who has returned to thee). Legend says (actually my grandaunt) that my grandmother was playing one day as a child in the garden and saw an angel calling her. Since that day, everybody in my (father’s side of the) family […]

On Being Mean To Kids In Public

This Sunday saw me babysitting my niece (aged 6) and nephew (aged 7) at Marina Square while the wife, sister-in-law and cousin went shopping. Luckily there was this event called “National Science Campaign 2006 - X!periment” going on with lots of fun exhibits for the kids to play with.
They had a stage upfront and this […]

Happy Merdeka Whatever Day

In case you didn’t know, today is Malaysia’s Independence Day. In 1957, the warlords overthrew their colonial overlords and in 2006, Malaysia is still a third-world nation. Yes, I am being sarcastic.
So what does the cry Merdeka(!), which will be chanted by many a foolish, intellectually-challenged simpleton all over Malaysia today, mean?
Merdeka means freedom in […]

So Like I Now Appreciate Travel Agents A Great Deal

photo via
Since I was going to be away all of next week at various locations on business, my wife noted that my last stop was rather attractive and decided she was going to fly over to join me so we could have a mini holiday.
So I visited a varity of online travel websites to purchase […]

Damn This Gay Shite

Set in New York City in the mid-1980s, Act One of Millennium Approaches introduces us to the central characters. Louis Ironson is a neurotic, homosexual Jew who lives with his lover, Prior Walter. Until, that is, Prior develops AIDS—still a poorly understood disease— Louis, unable to cope with the stress, moves out. Meanwhile, closeted Mormon […]

Such Is The Polluted Stream That Is Man

Such it was when I recently discovered vore - short for vorarephilia, a sexual fetish involving creatures eating and digesting other creatures. This can be animals eating other animals as they would in the wild, or, more hilariously, people getting eaten by giant animals, or people eating other people.
Strange fetishes, all bound to sicken and […]

And I Still Have No Wireless Broadband You Bastards!!

In search of the ever elusive wireless broadband so I can finally download pron check my mail at home in Malaysia, I stumbled across this on the website of one of those companies who profess to offer wireless broadband to consumers.

Hi, my name is LOO HUI. I am 21 years old. My hobby is swimming […]

Let The Floodgates of Woe, Open - KNNBCCB!!!

In case you didn’t know, the 30 cent price hike for petrol has triggered riots in Malaysia. Jeff Ooi has the complete story.
I have one thing to say about this.
PM Abdullah Badawi is a handsome wise gandalf-like figure that has proved to be ultimately utterly useless in serving the people. Under him, life has gotten […]

Problems In My Life At The Moment

I have no more life since I work 14 hours a day and travel every other day.

I joined a Lemony Project (read: one big mess)
My boss resigned

I am unable to recruit more people to join my team because resourcing simply can’t find any.
My vendor is going bonkers and their lead project manager told me […]

Dear Mr Emil Chau

Dear Mr Emil Chau,
After all your years of travelling to Singapore to perform and plead for the public to donate money for kidney patients, it turns out that only 10 cents from every dollar went to the kidneyically challenged amongst other wrongdoings.
If anybody has a right to be pissed, it’s you and I’m sure that […]

It’s So Sad

I found out from my sobbing mom that my uncle has died interstate intestate (no will) . To make matters worse, my aunt does not know anything about the family finances because he used to take care of everything. She doesnt know what insurance policies he bought, what the PIN to his ATM cards are, […]

Another Tragedy

My wife and I just got home from a party. We were having a lovely time. In fact, we wanted to stay all the way and get roaring drunk after the security guards broke up the party at 10.30pm on the grounds that we were some sort of public nuisance.
The problem is this.
My uncle just […]

The Walls Came Crumbling Down

First i thought to myself.. damn those contractors.. they dint secure the Tv tightly on the feature wall… blardy hell. When i got there… the gates to the compound were wide open… “that’s new .. ” i thought to myself. Then i noticed an ambulance parked next to the pool… as we walked towards the […]

Servants No More

The flat used to be a whorehouse.
The maid was a prostitute. And Madam The Min Yek was her pimp.
It is with great disgust that I read such articles like this where people simply treat their maids like playthings.
Perhaps the problems is the language we use. If we didn’t refer to the people who come from […]

Miyagi Is Dead

Mourn with me all ye faithful, the venerable mr miyagi has passed away.
link

Hideous Abuse Of Power

A 20-second MMS has created an unprecedented stir in Parliament among Ministers and MPs. It shows a naked woman in a room or cell, with back to the camera, instructed by a policewoman to do ten “ear squats”. There was one brief showing the naked woman from the front.
Malaysian opposite leader Lim Kit Siang has […]

You Will Deny Me Thrice

photo by Tread
I am in fact, a terrible friend.
Sometimes I think it’s due to the fact that I do not really need people around me. Therefore, I tend to not treasure friendship. Ok, maybe that’s harsh - I tend to take friendship for granted. If a person is not around then it’s like out of […]

Cast The First Stone, Go On

photo by Johnny Malkavian
When I wrote about what I have happened to noticed, it was inspired by this news article I saw in TNP about the ‘Hottest Blogger’ Dawn Yeo. At the time, I was just saddened that apparently you had to be hot to be a popular blogger.
The very same day, rumours that she […]

Behold The Hellspawn of Apple

“Podtropolis, as its name suggests, is an iPod-only BitTorrent indexing site. Like most BitTorrent sites, Podtropolis has a variety of genres such as music, movies, music videos and TV programming. Yet the most interesting aspect of Podropolis is the selection of videos for Apple’s fifth generation player. Each and every torrent file available is specifically […]

Right Wrong Right Wrong Right Wrong Whatever

A model parades in front of street children, some of whom are sniffing glue, in the drug-infested ‘Barrio Triste’ (Sad Neighborhood) in downtown Medellin in Colombia November 7, 2005. The event was organised to entertain the children by a member of a local charity that helps children in Barrio Triste by providing food, clothes and […]

Tampines: Car Bursts Into Flames!

10 minutes ago I was travelling on bus 81 along Old Tampines Road when a car in front burst into flames. Managed to take a few pictures and videos. Here are some of them
Local blogger Roamer was on a bus this afternoon when a car suddenly blew up. Armed with his phone, he took some […]

The End Of Your Credit Is Nigh

Need extra cash quickly? Now you can get a cash advance from your credit card by easily crediting funds from your credit card to your account, to another third party DBS/POSB account, or an inter-bank account - yet another first from DBS.
In an unprecedented move of sheer genius (which everybody knows is a double-edged blade), […]

The Sins Of The Mother

Thirteen-year-old twins Lamb and Lynx Gaede have one album out, another on the way, a music video, and lots of fans.
They may remind you another famous pair of singers, the Olsen Twins, and the girls say they like that. But unlike the Olsens, who built a media empire on their fun-loving, squeaky-clean image, Lamb and […]

Almost Daily WTF: Evil Mofo

Early 1970s | Convicted for possession of a firearm. Jailed 1 year
1973 | Convicted for peddling LSD. Sentence unknown
1987 | Pleaded guilty to possessing sexually explicit material involving juveniles. Jailed for six months
1989 | Left for Indonesia
1990 | Charged in US with raping 7-year-old son
1997 | Returned to US to stand trial on rape charges
1998 […]

In Life, The Monsters Win

For every child that should be playing with other children of their age, but lies bleeding from a rape or being sodomized on a filthy mattress in a dark dank putrid room stinking of urine and filth, the idea of life being ugly and unfair must ring a terrible truth.
Because in life, the monsters win. […]

Man, This Hits The Spot

Being poor is knowing exactly how much everything costs.
Being poor is hoping the toothache goes away.
Being poor is knowing your kid goes to friends’ houses but never has friends over to yours.
Being poor is not talking to that girl because she’ll probably just laugh at your clothes.
Being poor is hoping you’ll be invited for […]

All Tomorrow’s Charities

Selected charity will get adopted by Tomorrow for 3 months. They will be placed prominently on Tomorrow with a paypal donation button. All money raised via Tomorrow will be given to the adopted charity.
Tomorrow.sg needs your help to locate a suitable charity to donate moolah to. With so many charities out there, they need suggestions […]

We Want To Get More Lost

My housemate and I are feeling pretty shitty right now. We finished watching the last remaining episodes of Lost (season 1) at 3am last night after a saga of DIY home cinema, peanutbutter & jelly sandwiches and Sri Lankan tea. For the past week, our heroin has been Lost. Our cells crave and ache for […]

What Kin Ye Dae?

Ok folks, stop emailing me about the trials and tribulations of an unwanted pregnancy. Here’s my take: -

Never take meat injections without protection, EVAR.
Abortion is wrong.
Divorce is also wrong
A loveless marriage is long-term poison
It’s really none of my business nor yours, so bugger off

I hear that the local papers have picked up the story. […]

Almost Daily WTF Part 4

We all know that on account of our national superiority, during the thriving and prosperous Tang Dynasty our civilization was at the peak of the world. We were the center of the world civilization, and no other civilization in the world was comparable to ours. Later on, because of our complacency, narrow-mindedness, and the self-enclosure […]

Almost Daily WTF Part 3

“A distressing example of the breakdown of moral and social values . . .” 62 of the 66 accused were convicted and sentenced in France’s largest child sex abuse case to date. From 1999 to 2002, 45 children in Angers, aged 6 months to 12 years, were prostituted by their own families in exchange for […]

Some Jokes Are Just Not Funny

A colleague of mine was telling us through gnashed teeth over a wonton noodle lunch about the divine wisdom of ye eldritch gods. Apparently her dept lost their head a year ago. Since then they’ve been surviving without a head but have been losing their admin staff on a regular basis. Their workload has increased, […]

So That’s Why I Keep Hearing Your Shite

It’s confirmed. Sony has been caught paying off radio stations to pimp artistes like J-Lo, Audioslave and Franz Ferdinand(?). No wonder I don’t bother listening to radio anymore and focus solely on music blogs for my ipod. The intarweb must be the best thing to happen to the music scene since napster(sic).
I mean, the […]

More Blasts In London!!!

Explosions in 3 London subway stations and one on bus caused by small bombs!!!
And Wikipedia is already covering the situation in real-time. Page updates as more news and information becomes available. The blogosphere is already covering it as well.
If you have comments on your own blog, or information to share - you can […]

Why?

I just received this from Xiaxue:
MY blogger and gmail account got hacked. All blogs are deleted, all
3000 emails gone.
I cannot retrieve both passwords because blogger’s password prompt is
sent to my gmail account, and as for gmail, I have no idea why they
are not sending my password to my secondary account.
Please help me to announce this […]

Wikipedia Coverage Of London Explosions

If you don’t already know, several bombs have gone off in London and the subway has been shutdown. Wikipedia has amazing coverage of the situation, as it did with the Tsunami diasaster. All the news from different sources has been summarized and placed into one page, which is being updated continually.
Link to wikipedia page
Update: There […]

Nancy Kissel’s Deadly Milkshakes

Simon has a morbid fascination with Nancy ‘Milkshake’ Kissel and has dedicated an entire category on his blog to chronicle the trials (and tribulations) of the murderous bitch.
Let me summarize it for you in case you’ve never heard of the Milkshake Murderer.

Wife has an affair
Husband finds out
Husband forgives wife
Wife continues affair, husband hires PI
Husband decides […]

Sad But True

I swear to you that the above actually happened to me in meeting one day (2 months ago to be exact). It’s not funny, it’s just friggin sad.

My Favourite Couple Is:

This has to be the dumbest movie tie-in competition EVAR.
Golden Village has a bunch of couples in lovey-dovey(puke) poses and wants you to vote for them!!! But get this, to vote you’ll have to submit:

Your name
IC number
Address
Mobile number
Email
Age

Are you taking part in a contest or applying to join the secret service? If you feel […]

The Birds Are Coming

Damn I hate animals - here’s why.
And if my dearest LMD is reading this, yes I farking hate your dog and here’s what happens to rich bratty gals with dogs. Haha.

Mine Blacklist Has No Mercy

Dear Comment-Spamming Scum
Your recent increase in activity has left me righteously pissed-off. While I can accept the occasional comment spam on my blog for your bizarre fetish for online casinos, the recent week’s relentless spamming has left me no other option. What were you thinking when you thought I wouldn’t notice a couple of hundred […]

There is no hope for the human race

Not that I want to judge, but the evidence is all there (especially in the case of skank I) and just reading it makes me feel rather ill. I need to go sit down for a bit.
Skank I
Skank II