Cowboy Caleb the liberal arts, grown-up stuff & random mischief

Jaywalk Saves A Beggar From Death By Habanero

For some reason, the prosperous town of Chang An in the city of Dongguan has been flooded with beggers who arrived with the spring season. These beggars who for a lack of imgination have a rather obvious modus operandi, namely

1) The lady with the fat baby who needs milk money
2) The attractive young lass who needs money for a meal
3) The attractive young lass who needs money for bus ticket.
4) The old man.

One might mistake them for Cylons.

They (the beggars) love to approach Westerners and foreign Chinese because as Jaywalk has noticed, we are the group most likely not to carry small change and the smallest ‘donation’ we give would be either a RMB10, RMB50 or if the beggar is lucky - an RMB100 note.

So anyway, after a satisfying dinner yesterday night - a beggar of the “old man” variety actually had the audacity to stand at the door of the restaurant to beg. Since we were the only patrons left inside the shop and were sitting close to the door, obviously some sort of response was required.

We had 2 new Taiwanese friends with us. One of them decided to give the last piece of Pizza to the begger instead of cash, because one should not encourage begging. The beggar accepted the pizza to my surprise because the locals here do not like cheese.

And then the beggar did the unthinkable - spotting the numerous bottles of booze on our table, he asked for a drink.

To be frank, I am not sure if we were surprised or shocked by his audacity. One of the Taiwanese (who had already had 7 beers in the past 2 hours) had an idea.

He took the bottle of Tabasco sauce (Habenero flavour) and wanted to give to the beggar - but Jaywalk stopped his hand, saying:

“Bie Zhe Yang, Hui You Bao Ying De” (Don’t do that, cosmic retribution will bite you in the ass)

And then the 6 foot Candian owner noticed the begger and came to the door to shoo him away.

So Jaywalk saved a beggar last night from death by Habanero.

LMAO!!

Ah, this JayWalk fella is so nice.

There were a few reason I stopped them.

1) That was the only bottle of Habenero Sauce in the entire restaurant that owner Robert brought in specially for me and you want to give it away??!!

2) I lived nearby and I don’t wish to see a pile of shit at my front door….. with Habenero Sauce on it.

p.s Alamak…. you pichar my lobang. Now people know that ACS boys CAN speak mandarin. Oh the blasphemy!!

…..

ppl ald begging for a living, need to play prank on him some more meh?

kns.

jay so much more like human

naeboo, the problem here is that there are so many more scammers out there than real beggars and so it is almost impossible to tell one from the other.

A few years ago, there was a news article about how the syndicates are going around the rural areas to “buy” children who are handicapped.

The parents are more than happy to offload these “financial burdens” and knowing that they would be better taken care of in terms of food (but probably not shelter) as compared to shelter back home (but probably not food due to their poverty).

Today I saw a begger with no nose after breakfast.

Aawwwwwwww! JW melts my cold cold heart… …

cbc>huh… …

Grasshopper: Whoa!! Keep your knickers on!!

got ppl wear knickers on their hearts ah? hahahahhaa

-_-”

Sometimes dont know to be sad or happy that the world is turning out like this…