Cowboy Caleb the liberal arts, grown-up stuff & random mischief

Going North

Family Suite - RM600
Dinner - RM25/head
Walking up 5 storeys from the carpark basement lugging my bags because there is no lift - priceless

And that’s my verdict for the Swiss Garden Hotel where my entire family stayed for the night this weekend. For a four star hotel, it sure felt rather shabby. The food at their restaurant wasn’t spectacular. The toilet got stuck and wouldn’t flush. Sure, maybe it was me feeling crabby after having been driving all day around Malacca delivering wedding cakes to my wife’s relatives and then having to drive up to Kuala Lumpur immediate after that in the evening.

I love Kuala Lumpur. What’s there to hate about it? Traffic jams galore, great food, crime and flyovers - the hallsmarks of a true megacity. Everytime I go there, I get lost because the roads keep changing. The entire city is like one huge organism constantly evolving. It’s funny how I feel like a tourist each time I visit. It’s my friggin capital city leh. Note: A tall Starbucks drugs cost RM12.00 here.

My wife’s relatives were mildly shocked that her husband-to-be didn’t speak Cantonese. Apparently the notion of a Chinese speaking anything but Cantonese is a new concept to them. Maybe they haven’t been to China before?

But I really don’t mind because the people here speak worse mandarin then I. My wife and I bought matching phone numbers for our wedding at a Digi store. The salesgirl there asked if we would like to buy a handphone because (in her words) “It’s only er-pai kuai“. Ha ha ha!

The drive up was hell because I spent the previous night playing the fool. The night before was spent at a Starbucks-organized party (more on this later) where we OD’ed on frapuccinos and played educational games originally designed to train Baristas. Fueled by much caffeine, I hopped over to the Obiang party where even the taxi driver was horrified to discover an ad-hoc fashion shoot going on in the middle of the street. Randy really knows how to throw a party. After several beers I made a quick exit and went home to pack.

You try lah. Mix beer and caffeine and all you’ll be doing in bed is staring at the ceiling all night.

You try lah. Mix beer and caffeine and all you’ll be doing in bed is staring at the ceiling all night.

sex with u must be so damn crappy.

In your dreams, skank… dream on - ain’t going to happen evar.

who says im saying sex with u and me being involved? YOU dream on