Cowboy Caleb the liberal arts, grown-up stuff & random mischief

What Do I Know? I’m A Bloke

Minishorts, author of the infamously R-rated Bedtime Stories and longtime fellow blogger contacted me today and sought my wisdom to help her finish one of her new yarns.

At first she thinks I’m uncomfortable with the question because I keep pointing her to other websites, but later she discovers the irony of asking a man about blowjobs.

minishorts: i need lessons
Cowboy: in?
minishorts: i need to write the blow job episode
minishorts: but i dunno how to do it
minishorts: haha
Cowboy: dunno how to give a blowjob?
minishorts: dunno what’s ideal and what’s not
minishorts: yes dunno how to give a blowjob
Cowboy: i pass you some video porn site so you can go watch and learn?
minishorts: CANNOT lah
minishorts: i want the parts of the penis described and find out if there are other slangs to parts like the
minishorts: shaft
minishorts: the foreskin
minishorts: etc
Cowboy: errr
Cowboy: wait ah
minishorts: under the foreskin that V shaped weblike part call what
Cowboy: http://www.literotica.com/stories/index.php
minishorts: X-(
Cowboy: read and learn
Cowboy: from the best and most peverted
minishorts: this conversation too open for you izzit
Cowboy: no
minishorts: i need to make it less graphical
Cowboy: I also never gave a blowjob before WHAT

Cowboy: hallo
minishorts: you don’t give blowjob to girls meh?
Cowboy: that’s….cunnilingus….
Cowboy: blowjobs are performed on men
minishorts: it IS NOT hilarious
Cowboy: yes it is
minishorts: it’s educational. can’t you be the older wiser adult and be kind with your knowledge PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
Cowboy: errr
minishorts: how to make it less graphical?
Cowboy: I dont know anything about sucking penises
Cowboy: ok is this for your blog?
Cowboy: or for work
minishorts: for the blog lah
minishorts: i mean rapunzel… came along… and told me she was going to
minishorts: you know describe her first blow job
minishorts: but …
minishorts: it WAS FAR TOO GRAPHICAL for me.
minishorts: so i need to tone it down.
Cowboy: she licked the shaft of his throbbing manhood and flicked her tongue along the opening of his prick
minishorts: i have to do ‘i’
minishorts: i can’t say
minishorts: ‘i licked the shaft of his throbbing manhood and flicker my tongue along the opening of his prick.’
minishorts: it looks positively OBSCENE
Cowboy: no what
Cowboy: i saw it in mills and boon before
minishorts: mills and boon got describe blowjob meh?
minishorts: OMFG YOU READ MILLS AND BOON!
Cowboy: last time
minishorts: OHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
minishorts: OH MY GOD
Cowboy: last time got no internet
minishorts: hahahahhah you read mills and boon
Cowboy: therefore got no access to pron
minishorts: YOU READ MILLS AND BOON!
Cowboy: last time my time very different ok
Cowboy: dammit
Cowboy: hahaa

Cowboy: ok
minishorts: YOU FUCKING READ MILLS AND BOON!
minishorts: hahaha
Cowboy: long long ago
minishorts: aiyah never mind
minishorts: anyway
minishorts: the last mills and boon i read just talked about the bed rocking

You READ MILLS AND BOON!!!

Hahahahahahahahahaha!!!

Now we know why you so lomantic! So when was the last time you felt your loins afire with need?

Hahahahahahahahahaha!!!

Eh, you got read Sweet Sixteen series too or not?

LOL!!!!!!!

lol. the picture of a cowboy reading mills and boon is kinda disturbing.

*fell off chair*

priceless

my friend “lousy-dare”d me to read one of those trashy books here, since i’d never bothered to before. I was laughing so hard during the sex scenes, the author would have been soooo disappointed.

OMGGGGGGG
WALAAAAN!
Can ask MOB, she read erotica mah!

what’s mills and boon?!

*mumble mumble* wat’s wrong with reading mills & boon.

i have *count fingers count toes* no. of these romance novels.
and i love reading them… yea…

double standards indeed…..

mills and boon was my 1st source of erotica ‘information’ too, so i can understand you cowboy.

those were the days when graphical sexual acts were more sexy as it worked the imagination more than hardcore pornographic lyrics and visuals of today’s sleaze.

mm - btw that v-shaped stuff is called frenulum (or frenum) :)

i would have reacted the same way as minishorts if my guy frens admitted they read Mills & Boons. But then, it takes guts to admit ok??? Bravo,CC!

Mills and boons hahhahahahhahahaah

Reading is more erotic than bare hardcore visuals thogh

*wide grin* mills and boon was erotica back then. how many remember sneaking mills and boon in our schoolbags and then off to toilets and locked bedrooms to read??!!! muahahahahah. oh dear. looking back, that was so lame man.

tomorrow, I will go to the nearest bookshop and buy a bagful of mills and boons.. for oldtimes sake…

wahhahaha.

[...] before Oh wow. He learns from Mills and Boon. The entire chat is presented by the Cowboy here. WOW. What a revelation. And [...]

Oh my, the chat is just hilarious. Haha, I still think the Net is the best source for minishorts. The Internet is just a wonderful place. :)