Cowboy Caleb the liberal arts, grown-up stuff & random mischief

The Tribe, They Suck

Last night we drove Mandrake to the airport after work so he could catch his flight to Brisbane. When he had finished checking in his luggage, he came back to us and asked Now what?

Caleb: I think we’re obliged to accompany you until your last call or something
Angrybeaver : The dude is going off for a week with some woman we don’t know and we gotta keep him company until last call?
Caleb: Fuck you, Mandrake. We’re going off now

And so off we went, looking for a pub because none of us were hungry. First stop was Siglap area where to our dismay - where a pub once stood was a Fish & Chips rest instead.

Then we went off to Blooies which is located deep inside the housing district of Siglap. It’s a very tree-huttish place. Mostly caucasian expats. We grabbed a table near the pool table and ordered drinks + food. SD was very happy because the waitress serving us was kinda cute in the gal-next-door context and was giving us fantastic service.

AngryBeaver loosens up after a few drinks.

I need a girlfriend he declares, because I have sexual needs.

That is a terrible reason to get a girlfriend, I respond.

Remember in secondary school, you would tell the gal “You like me right, then suck my dick”.

There was pregnant pause.

I’m joking you assholes the beaver finally says.

There are several levels of bitchiness. In descending order we have:
1) Bitch
2) Biaytch
3) Skank
4) Slut
5) Labia

Ahhh yes, life according to the AngryBeaver. After that beaver gets his ass trounced at the pool table by the angmo’s a couple of times.

Women begin to start calling SD at around 1am.

I’m so sad. Can we go get sloshed?
Come to Blooies at Siglap
But I am at Madam Wong’s right now, can’t you guys come over?
Biaytch!!!! Obey my wang!

SD calls the waitress. I cannot get drunk. Tell the bartender to do something about it!

Who is driving tonight, sir?

SD points his finger at me, I point my finger at AngryBeaver who in turn points his finger at SD.

We’ll be taking a cab home later.

Waitress goes OMG you guys can really drink, so amazing.

So can we have a foursome with you then, honey?

Anyway the bartender mixes up some weird ass on-fire drink with swirling properties more properly best described as a merlin style magic potion which has absolutely no effect on SD.

In fact after that we have a lot more drinks. We switch from beer to whiskey and brandy.

And after that SD is able to drive all of us home. Safely.

oh my gosh! U GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!! *LOL*
biyatch!!!!!!!!!!

looks like you had a fun time too.

Now we know the real reason why guys need girls.

powerpuff > Actually I don’t know if SD and beaver got home alive. I havent heard from them since last night.

evie > not as much as you! Biaytch!

Ping > to serve us drinks of course.

caleb, sd is alive and kicking. in fact, i think he is a superhero.

‘m drunk again!!!1

you all FREAKIn’ DRUNKARDS!