Cowboy Caleb the liberal arts, grown-up stuff & random mischief

Christians Are We?

It’s time to talk about Christians again. For those not in the know, I am a non-practising Catholic due to various inner conflicts with church dogma and general animosity towards blind faith.

This time, I would like to rant about the duties of a good christian. For the many many recent converts who have joined the swollen ranks of protestant (yes, if you’re not a catholic then you’re a protestant) churches like CHC, CCC ETC then know this - your soul is in mortal dire.

As a protestant christian, you may be aware that a large chunk of your quality christian time is spent in the following manner

1. Reading archaic verses from the bible (translated into english from greek from aramaic).
2. Trying to convince your friends/family that Jesus Saves, Hallelujah!
3. Paying tithes so your church may expand their borg program
4. Buying the latest cd (at least 6) released by your church pastor
5. Attending christian magick shows featuring pastors with sorcerous powers and warlock abilities
6. Talking in tongues and resting in the spirit
7. Attending 3 hour church sessions

Are you saved?

No, says Cowboy Caleb. Hell no.

You won’t go to hell, but you sure will be spending as much time in purgatory as the next non-christian person. Why Jesus, Why!!!

Because all of the above don’t matter really. They are all activities thought up by protestant churches to attract the youth of today who are blessed with short attention spans.

If you want to go directly to heaven and bypass purgatory, you need to live you life doing christian stuff like this.

Other things that I think will increase your time in purgatory

1. Relying too much on the bible. It’s a crutch.
2. Trusting too much in your church. Read and expand your horizons. The truth is out there.
3. ‘My god is bigger then your god’ mentality
4. Thinking your priest/pastor is infallible.
5. Not giving up your seat for a pregnant or elderly person
6. Not visiting my blog everyday

erotica.

Yes, erotica.. that will save us all!
By the way, can give some stuff you wrote? no need all lah.

erotica is good. God told us to go and multiply.

Your erotica will help others achieve that goal. The end justifies the means eh?

I want to see how Mandrake is going to magicaly tranmogrify this post into another tity discussion.

Agree Agree Agree.

Evie started tits.. I mean “it”…

It’s breast you don’t go blaming her dude.

I mean best

lol, I sometimes zap into the christian channels here on US TV, man they are ..fancy. In Ger, protestants are not at all this kind of maniacs. It’s the most easy going type of church I can think of.

Caleb, you are such a breast, I mean beast.

Aneki: I’ve never been to a protestants church before.

i agree with you in everything minus the final pt. 6

Aneki > Yes I noticed German protestants are a decent lot. It’s the new churches that I worry about.

Powerpuff > why your blog is password protected now?

EVERYBODY CHECK OUT http://www.drcomenge.com/apothia/apothia.swf

Well done caleb. Can i name my latest pink story after you? You’ll be the lost cowboy trying to hitch hike.

Well done caleb. Can i name my latest pink story after you? You’ll be the lost cowboy trying to hitch hike.

No, you may not name any pink stories after me!!!

I am a homo-phobe remember?

i think there’s a stalker reading my stuff… :(

will give the tribe my password, later

CCC are a cult or so I heard. Anyway, there are many roadmaps. It depends on which one St. Peter is holding up there in the big blue. Too bad we don’t really know.

powerpuff > befriend the stalker, so we can trap him later. I thought you watched enough eps of 24 to know we can CTU ppl.

Idler > I think Islam may be the right one… since true faiths are always being persecuted according to history.

stalker= as in someone who knows me and who i am.

I am afraid he tells the ppl i write about in my blogs what I wrote :| but I did not show any hostility towards him yet.
if you guys can trap him, pls do. this will be fun

Too late. Will post the story soon!

i will read that pink story:P

Powerpuff > give me his number and forget it. It’s being taken care of. From now on, you will call me foxton.

evie > why dun you post some lesbian stories about you and powerpuff instead, biaytch!

i dunno who the stalker is! thats the problem!

then how do you know there is a stalker. You haven’t been in the magic mushroom bin again have you?!

cause of the questions he asked in the comments

email the pswd to my office email pls

I think gays are always gay and hence the name. You think so?

no, gays are prone to depression and bouts of self-abuse.

evie, actually i think gays got variety of personalities. like normal men. some are gay(happy), some are bitter, some are bitchy, some are arrogant etc etc etc….
caleb, u can check in 10mins

yes, gays are people.

Just like us. All marked with the doom of man.

But all the ones I’ve met are happy ones. Happy cute rich but unavailable. Bitches.

Happy cute rich

no wonder they’re gay gays you silly cow.