Cowboy Caleb recommends NuffNang
and Text Link ads to earn money from your blog
If you spend all your time online, play online poker to make some money.
Have I ever told you that I agree “The Wire” is one of the greatest television series, EVAR? I’ve watched every single episode of every single season like twice already this year. This are the 100 greatest quotes, and they are amazing indeed.
Cowboy Caleb would like to start a petition for this to happen. Oh yeah. @Joannepeh is definitely one of the hottest stars in Singapore.
Don’t know what 2 do in your spare time?
Always wanted 2 find a new hobby?
Got a hobby but no buddy 2 share it with?
We have all the answers! Get in2it!
One of the problems with Singapore is that everybody is so damned busy running. The reality is that you don’t have time to make friends outside of work (unless you are as popular as Cowboy Caleb hur hur) and therefore are one depressed and lonely mofo when it comes to days like Halloween.
Enter in2it.sg – the website that connects you to other lonely people with loads of free time after office hours and strange hobbies like yours. Alternatively, you could use it to hookup with attractive normal people with normal hobbies like watersports. Hey, you could even find your soulmate – who knows?
Anyyyyywayyyy do you remember the Safra PK Challenge I blogged about? Well, the SAFRA PK Challenge is heating up! Round 3 saw another two contestants eliminated as they failed to impress with their choice of a modern rendition of an 80’s song. Last weekend also saw two surprise guest PK Challengers, Roy Lim and Zaxx. Both are local singers with an impressive track record, the latter even has her own album out!
PK Challenge Round 4 leaves behind the best of the crop as our original participants beat both the guest challengers – Lin Si tong and Joshua Teo. Last weekend featured fast pop songs leaving our remaining contestants (Sheryl Choo, Eddie Soh, Jeremaine Yeo, Clara Yap, Karen Lin and Bai Jun Long) for Round 5.
I wonder what’s going to happen in Round 5?
Checkout the video of the latest round here, and post some comments to shout out which contestant sang your favourite 80’s song and you may be one of the 5 lucky winners to get yourself a magazine pack (imported only, in2it.sg believes only in the good stuff) worth over $50!
Join me on the forum (registration is required but it is quick and painless), and let’s tease the shite out of these wannabes!
15 minutes ago, I left the Japanese restaurant located just outside my apartment block. It is an upscale eatery with Japanese speaking service staff, catering to mainly my Japanese expat neighbours.
Today, because I felt so down, I ordered a bottle of sake to go along with the salmon sashimi, cold noodles and prawn tempura.
Today, because I felt so down, I drank all the sake and wasn’t interested in a bite of food. When I asked for the bill, the waitress looked at my untouched food and asked if anything was the matter.
I told her the sake was excellent.
Then, I popped into the liquor shop next door and bought a bottle of Bacardi, some soda water and a few lemons.
The theme of today’s morose mood is ” After 30, The Things You Love Fall Away”. I find that as I grow older, the things I love confuse me, and the things I no longer love are becoming a burden.
Some burdens are too heavy to bear alone.
I just bought this new game called Torchlight online.
Because it’s looks set to be a lonely weekend.
Because I have given up drinking.
Because I like pretending that I’m actually an elf slinging bows and arrows into the crotches of foul-smelling orcs and goblins.
The expat supermarkets I had found so far had been found lacking and selling overpriced shite. To make matters worse, the selection of imported food at places like Carrefour was found to be severely lacking.
Having picked up a copy of a the only freely distributed English magazine in Guangdong called “Here! Dongguan”, I began flicking through the classifieds section. To my surprise, I found a Jusco supermarket located about 20 minutes from my apartment. If you don’t know, Jusco is a Japanese chain of supermarkets and malls which have proven to be extremely popular in Malaysia where they are known as Jaya Jusco.
Upon arrival at the supermarket, I nearly wept when I found the same layout in China, that you would find in Malaysia. Fruits were neatly stacked. Meats were chopped into tidy bits, cleaned and then wrapped in foil. For the first time, an idiot like me could shop without cringing because the average China supermarket isn’t very different from a wet market.
I bought lots of steak (pre-marinated with black pepper), enough for an entire week.
The important goods section were just as impressive. Jusco didn’t really declare they had an imported goods section but instead decided to just mix everything together.
Quality of life here just went up by 5 points.
A couple of years ago, I was walking along Ann Siang hill after work to look for a friend so we could head off to the bar for a beer when suddenly a white van pulls up and this old chinese dude pops his head out the window and asks me if I would like to buy some branded speakers for next to nothing (well SGD500 actually).
Apparently, he been asked to deliver 20 sets, but had somehow been given 21 sets by mistake so he wanted to make some money.
Despite showing me some brochures, I declined his offer because I know nothing about speakers and basically do not appreciate audio hi-fi in the least.
Now I discover, that this is a scam and it exists all over the world.
Today, I succumbed and drank a cup of hot coffee down in one gulp despite swearing to myself that I would never touch that heroin again. After every last drop of brown liquid had found its way into my belly, I felt the familiar sense of glowing happiness begin to seep into the pores of my skin.
It was a feeling not unlike a good blowjob by an ugly woman.
I am deathly afraid of habit-forming consumables and of forming habits. They are a crutch that quite frankly, a man born without station or advantages in life like me, can ill afford.
Caffeine is something that inspires a sense of dread and longing at the same time in my loins. For on one hand, it perks you up but then you come to a point where you simply can’t function without it. I know people that can’t even start their day without having a cup of the heroin first.
Little wonder that drug dealers like Starbucks and Ya Kun rake in the big bucks.
I’d advise any and all my readers not to drink this shite.
It was a grey and lifeless day yesterday in Shanghai. I could barely feel the passage of time because the sun was hidden behind clouds of gravel-coloured cotton. Although I had left Suzhou at 7am in the morning and slept all the way during the dull 2 hour journey to the Pudong section of Shanghai, I still felt as if I had just woke up.
After spending most of the morning in meetings, I was brought out for lunch at a nearby industrial area that can be best described as Sixth Avenue meets Kallang Puding Road (for those Malaysians reading this, think Bangsar meets Shah Alam industrial area). My colleague dropped me in front of the restaurant so she could park the car.
My eye immediately spotted a pushcart laden with books outside the Carrefour hypermarket next to the restaurant.
Books! A rarity in China!
I quickly walked over and skimmed through the titles with my eyes. OH MY GOD. It was laden with all kinds of good shite ranging from Harry Potter to the Harvard Business Review to Salman Rushdie.
I asked the man guarding the cart
“Duo shao yi ben xu?” (How much for a book, asshat?)
“She guai yi ben, hou de she oo” (10 renminbi, but the thicker ones are 15 renminbi)
Stunned at the price, my mouth nearly dropped. It was then that my colleague appeared from behind and whispered in my ear – these books are fakes/knockoffs/pirated.
Apparently it is true that China is the market leader in knockoffs. I bought a fake copy of Dan Brown’s latest “The Lost Symbol”. Upon close inspection, the ink is inconsistently dark and light on different pages, it lacks many things like a copyright page and the quality of paper is terrible.
But it was dirt cheap.
Hooray for pirated shite.
For the past 4 days, I have been running about nonstop on business.
The worst part about business travel for me is that I am reminded how lonely life can be.
So I’m now sitting in the waitingarea of Shanghai’s HongQiao airport waiting to board my plane when it hits me that in the past, after I traveled on business and got the job done, the flight back was always to HOME aka sillypore. Now it’s back to my apartment in southern china where all that is waiting for me is a cold dark empty house.
Man, this is very depressing.
Last night, I was furiously downloading shite to store on my iPhone and iPod in anticipation of my long boring flight to Shanghai today. You see, there is always a delay in take-off, landing and the damned planes do not have an in-flight entertainment system.
So while I was swilling away a couple of cans of Coke Lite (I’ve given up beer for 3 months, remember?) it suddenly occured to me that I was getting confused between what I’ve read, watched and listed to. In the past year, I have been reading a lot of books, watching movies that were adapted from books and then listening to audio-books adapted from books.
The most serious mind infraction was the curious case of Kazuo Ishiguro.
For the life of me, I have no idea if I have watched, listened or read “The Unconsoled” and “When We Were Orphans”. So immense is his talent, that even if I had not watched a movie based on those books, I certainly remember vivid images and voices. It is as if, he was able to project images directly into my brain, and etch them permanently there.
If that is not genius, then what indeed?
I made a list:
GELANG PATAH: A second theme park, after Legoland, is coming up in Iskandar Malaysia. It will be a 5,574 square metre indoor park meant to delight children below 12-years-old, said Johor Mentri Besar Datuk Abdul Ghani Othman.
Dear Prime Minister of Malaysia
The children of Johor do not need another f87king theme park. They are all friggin stupid, ignorant and I think that’s how you like them.
Why not build some bleeding libraries instead? You know, a building filled with books?
Love Actually,
C. Caleb esq.
P.S: I am so not voting for you come next election day
I made a list:
Ok I give up.
The real reason why I don’t go to church anymore is because I don’t feel fit to be in your presence anymore with all the bad things I’ve done.
Also, with all the bad things I’ve done, I have doubts about your existence because no lightning bolts have since struck me dead (yet?).
There, I said it. I’m ashamed and in denial.
© Cowboy Caleb. Powered by WordPress using the DePo Clean Theme.
Subscribe to my blog feed
